The Power To Make Decisions

 

More than anything else, I believe it’s our decisions, not the conditions of our lives, which determine our destiny. You and I both know that there are people who were born with advantages: they’ve had genetic advantages, environmental advantages, family advantages, or relationship advantages. Yet you and I also know that we constantly meet, read, and hear about people who against all odds have exploded beyond the limitations of their conditions by making new decisions about what to do with their lives.

If you don’t make a decision about how you’re going to live, then you’ve already made a decision, haven’t you? You’re making a decision to be directed by the environment instead of shaping your own destiny.

Your life will change the day you determine not just what you’d like to have in your life or what you want to become, but when you decide who and what you are committed to having and being in your life. That’s a simple distinction, but a critical one.

Think for a moment. Is there a difference between being interested in something, and being committed to it? You bet there is! Many times people say things like, “Gosh, I really would like to make more money,” or “I’d like to be closer to my kids,” or “You know, I’d really like to make a difference in the world.” But that kind of statement is not a commitment at all. It’s merely stating a preference, saying, “I’m interested in having this happen, if I don’t have to do anything.” *That’s not power! It’s a weak prayer made without even the faith to launch it.*

*Not only do you have to decide what results you are committed to, but also the kind of person that you’re committed to becoming. *

Even if it all goes wrong, even if no one gives you the support that you need,* you still must stay committed to your decision that you will live your life at the highest level.*Unfortunately, most people never do this because they’re too busy making excuses. The reason they haven’t achieved their goals or are not living the lives they desire is because of the way their parents treated them, or because of the lack of opportunities that they experienced in their youth, or because of the education they missed, or because they’re too old, or because they’re too young. All of these excuses are nothing but B.S. (Belief Systems)! And they’re not only limiting, they’re destructive.

*You must know that you can make a new decision right now that will immediately change your life—a decision about a habit you’ll change or a skill that you’ll master, or how you’ll treat people, or a call that you’ll now make to someone you haven’t spoken to in years*. You could make a decision right now to enjoy and cultivate the most positive emotions that you deserve to experience daily. Is it possible you might choose more joy or more fun or more confidence or more peace of mind?  Make the decision now that can send you in a new, positive, and powerful direction for growth and happiness.

“Nothing can resist the human will that will stake even its existence on its stated purpose.”

—BENJAMIN DISRAELI

Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.

Decisions act as the source of both problems and incredible joys and opportunities. This is the power that sparks the process of turning the invisible into the visible. *True decisions are the catalyst for turning our dreams into reality.*

Will today be the day you finally decide that who you are as a person is much more than you’ve been demonstrating? Will today be the day you decide once and for all to make your life consistent with the quality of your spirit? Then start by proclaiming, *“This is who I am. This is what my life is about. And this is what I’m going to do. Nothing will stop me from achieving my destiny. I will not be denied!”*Remember, as soon as you truly commit to making something happen, the “how” will reveal itself.

Now, you might be asking yourself this question: If making decisions is so simple and powerful, then why don’t more people “Just Do It”? I think one of the simplest reasons is that,* most of us don’t recognize what it even means to make a real decision*. We don’t realize the force of change that a congruent, committed decision creates. Part of the problem is that for so long most of us have used the term “decision” so loosely that it’s come to describe something like a wish list. Instead of making decisions, we keep stating preferences. Making true decisions is cutting off any other possibility. In fact, the word “decision” comes from the Latin roots* de*, which means “from,” and *caedere*, which means “to cut.” In other words, *Making a true decision means committing to achieving a result, and then cutting yourself off from any other possibility.*

*When you truly decide you’ll never smoke cigarettes or any other habit you want to quit, that’s it. It’s over! You no longer even consider the possibility of going back to it*. If you’re one of the people who have ever exercised the power of decision this way, you know exactly what I’m talking about. An alcoholic knows that even after years of absolute sobriety, if he fools himself into thinking that he can take even one drink, he’ll have to begin all over again. After making a true decision, even a tough one, most of us feel a tremendous amount of relief. We’ve finally gotten off the fence! And we all know how great it feels to have a clear, unquestioned objective.

This kind of clarity gives you an ability that will enable you to produce the results that you really want for your life. *The challenge for most of us is that we haven’t made a decision in so long we’ve forgotten what it feels like*. We’ve got flabby decision-making muscles! Some people even have a hard time deciding what they’re going to have for dinner.

So how do we strengthen these muscles? Give them a workout! *The way to make better decisions is to make more of them.* then make sure you learn from each one, including those that don’t seem to work out in the short term: they will provide valuable distinctions to make better evaluations and therefore decisions in the future. Realize that decision making, like any skill you focus on improving, gets better the more often you do it. The more often you make decisions, the more you’ll realize that you truly are in control of your life. You’ll look forward to future challenges, and you’ll see them as an opportunity to make new distinctions and move your life to the next level.

Three decisions that you make every moment of your life control your destiny. These three decisions determine what you’ll notice, how you’ll feel, what you’ll do, and ultimately what you will contribute and who you become. If you don’t control these three decisions, you simply aren’t in control of your life. When you do control them, you begin to sculpt your experience.

The three decisions that control your destiny are:

  1. Your decisions about what to focus on.
  2. Your decisions about what things mean to you.
  3. Your decisions about what to do to create the results you desire.

You see, it’s not what’s happening to you now or what has happened in your past that determines who you become. Rather, it’s your decisions about what to focus on, what things mean to you, and what you’re going to do about them that will determine your ultimate destiny. Know that if anyone is enjoying greater success than you in any area, they’re making these three decisions differently from you in some context or situation.

It’s likely that most challenges we meet in life could have been avoided by some better decisions upstream. Because there are two types of challenges or situation that everyone meets in life:

  1. Those that are caused by the person themselves.
  2. Those that are common to every human being. 1Cor 10:13

The question now becomes; What are you going through? Could it have been caused by you? Is it a consequences of a decision that u have made in the past? Something you did or did not do?

For example, we know that it’s unhealthy to eat too much sweets and sugar but if one knowing that, keeps eating more and more sugar, ice cream, and other sugary products and in the end gets diabetes; that diabetes is as a result of his decision.

So therefore, keep in mind that the DECISIONS you make TODAY will determine how your TOMORROW will look like!!! Make good ones!!!

 

For further reading, get Anthony Robbins’ book:  ‘Awakening The Giant Within’; you won’t regret it. Also I’m in no way related to or advertising Anthony Robbins or anything; his book previously mentioned has greatly inspired me and I’m just sharing some of what I learned through it.

 

The Best Is Always Yet To Come

#9 Second Most Important Day Of Life

‘ The two most important days of your life are: 

The day you are born and The day you find out why.’

 

_Mark Twain

 

It goes without saying that one of most celebrated days of a person all over the world is their birthdays. This is a day when every person who can afford it, buys cake, candles, drinks, calls friends and families and celebrates with them.

But this quote is telling us that we ought no to be hung up only on our birthdays but also as you celebrate it, also take time to think about why. For what reason were you born? What is your destiny? The day you will be able to answer such personal and deep questions, your life will start making sense.

I personally believe that every one of the 11 billion( if my math is correct) on earth has a particular and special place that only they can fill. Nobody is born just to go with the flow and repeat what others have already done. Each one of us has something no matter how little to give to the betterment of the world. It is our duty to take time and find out our proper place and position in the society.

Today, i’m encouraging you to look deeper into yourself, discover the treasure, the gem that only you have and use it to make a difference in the world. It might take some time, effort and numerous trial and error but when you find it; your life will never be the same again. It may be singing, dancing, writting, acting, car racing, motivational speaking, teaching, whatever it may be, go for it.

The good news is that you already possess it, you already have what you need to make a difference in your generation. Believe in yourself and Refuse to die with your light unseen and un-shone because it is simply too beautiful to be hidden.

Dig deep and Find it!!!

#8 Dare To Be Yourself

 

People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway

If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway

If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway

If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

 

Mother Theresa


 I don’t know what narrative to put on this one but I.Love.It!!

Mother Theresa has just become one of my most favourite role model!! If she were alive, I’d literally send her baskets of flowers!!😅😅

 I really hope this quote blessed and inspired you to be your best self as much as it did for me!!

Until Next Time!!✋

Code Red: When Everything Goes Out Of Control

 

I’m sure y’all are wondering what I’m referring to by ‘code red’, well it’s something called commonly known as “anger” (probably not what you were expecting huh!?). You might have seen that term in movies and books, when there’s a crisis, an attack anything that needs to addressed immediately. Well, anger is also an issue that cannot be ignored. If you have it, you cannot afford to ignore because it causes one to lose control.

Anger is a normal emotion we all experience at times. But when it gets out of control, it can cause problems in our relationships and in the overall quality of our lives.

This is not a small issue as some of you may think, because even myself sometimes I struggle with this anger issue. I often find myself losing my temper when things don’t go my way, when my expectations are not met, when bad things just keep happening to me for reasons I fail to understand, when i am belittled or face rejection and indifference, when my phone just suddenly decides to work against me and just switches itself off, when the bandwidth is not going fast enough, when i have a group work at school but nobody shows up for the work and I have to do it on my own for everyone, and so many other instances. I have realized that anger is like a deep pit, once you fall in it, it’s free falling with no end!! It causes one to lose control, really lose control over you emotions, actions, words, thoughts; just about everything!

Anger seems to be everywhere; you see it in parking lots, on the road, in supermarkets, in schools, homes, even in church.

Take this for example:

You’re stuck in traffic, making you late to work for the third time in a week. Walking in the door, you pass by a co-worker you cannot stand, who offers you a fake smile and a “you’re late” comment. You keep walking, but the anger that is simmering below the surface begins to move to the top. Upon reaching your desk, you notice a stack of work waiting that your boss wants done “ASAP.” You think about having a cup of coffee, then notice someone took the last drop and didn’t bother refilling the pot. About now, it feels like the top of your head may come off. You are truly cranky, and it’s not even 9 A.M.

Imagine what will happen when such a person gets home from work!!

As if that’s not enough almost every day a new twist on anger hits the newsstands. A high-school baseball coach breaks an umpire’s jaw over a disputed call. Two shoppers exchange blows over who deserves the first spot in a checkout lane that just opened. In California, an angry driver yanks a pet dog out of the vehicle that bumped his car and throws the animal into the oncoming traffic. The dog dies, and the man is sentenced to three years in jail. A 15-year-old boy gets fed up with being put down by his classmates and opens fire on them in his suburban San Diego high school.

 

These are just a drops in an ocean. Many of road accidents happen because of anger. Many marriages split because of anger. Relationships are breaking because of anger.

If you offend someone, you gotta brace yourself for an angry outburst, I remember I was walking in the streets one day going home, and I stepped on a guy, immediately I turned to him and said I’m sorry but it was as if my excuse fell on deaf ears, the guy started shouting on me, you’d think I had injured him for life. So it didn’t matter I said sorry or that it was unintentional, the first reaction was anger. I’m not saying everyone is like that, and I know there are people who are generally calm and collected but each one of us has had a brush with anger at some point.

According to Neil T. Anderson, in his book called: “Getting anger under control”, he says that sometimes we can’t help ourselves; He says and I quote:” We don’t have direct volitional control of the functioning of our glands. In the same way, we don’t have direct volitional control of our emotions, including the feelings of anger. We cannot will ourselves to like people we have an emotional hatred for. We can choose to do the loving thing for them even though we don’t like them; but we cannot simply tell ourselves to stop being angry, because we cannot directly manage our emotions that way. When we acknowledge that we are angry, however, we do have control over how we are going to express it. We can keep our behavior within limits; because that is something we have volitional control over. And we do have control of what we will think and believe, and that is what controls what we do and how we feel.” He uses a computer analogy to explain this anger phenomenon like this: our brain is the hardware, our minds is the software and we all know both have to work together; neither is any good without the other. The way it works for an angry person is like this, what is causing such an angry reaction is the brain (hardware), but it is the mind (software) and the way it has been programmed. Neither do the circumstances of life or other people and events that make us angry, it is our perception of those people and events and how we interpret them that determine whether we will lose our temper or not. And that is a function of our mind and how it’s been programmed.

Example:  Suppose you are busy shopping one day, when another person suddenly knocks you down and falls on top of you. You have no idea why the person has done that. If your initial thought is that the person is careless or rude, you will likely get angry. Your nervous system will respond immediately, enabling your body to react in a flight-or-fight response. If your external senses are telling you that the person is a thief who is armed, your adrenaline rush will help equip you to flee or protect yourself. If your external senses pick up that it was just some kids playing without supervision, you will be inclined to push them off you, dust yourself off, and reprimand them for their carelessness. Whatever the case, your anger is a natural response to how your mind interprets the data that is being picked up by your five senses.

Suppose your initial thought is directed toward the other person and not yourself. You may be wondering what has happened to this person who has fallen and is now lying on top of you. You may initially be angry, or at least startled, until your external senses give you some important new data. Now you realize this person is in trouble, and your anger quickly turns to sympathy, and that causes you to cry out for help. Then upon further examination, you realize that the person is simply drunk and has passed out. Now you are angry, and you push the person off with a strength you never knew you had. So how you feel is dependent upon the data you receive and how your mind interprets that data.

Can you see that!! So for some of us who have an issue with anger, then it is a programming problem, we gotta program ourselves the right way. But how do we do that? We gotta change our belief system because how our minds have been programmed is revealed by our belief system, which reflects our values and attitudes about life. In other words, what we believe does affect how we respond to the circumstances of life. If our identity and security are centered in our eternal relationship with God, then the things of life that are temporal have less of an impact on us. As we are conformed to the image of God, we will become a little more like Jesus.

Example: Suppose two partners in a business are confronted with a setback. They have just lost a contract they thought would bring them to a new level of prosperity. One partner, a nonbeliever, sees this as a financial crisis. He had believed that this new contract would make him successful. Many of his personal goals were going to be realized, but now his dreams are dashed. He responds in anger to all who try to console him and calls his lawyer to see if he can sue the company who broke the contract.

The other partner is a Christian who deeply believes that real success lies in becoming the person God created him to be. He believes that God will supply all his needs. Therefore, this loss has very little impact on him. He experiences some disappointment, but he doesn’t get angry because he sees this temporary reversal as an opportunity to trust in God. One of these two partners is stressed out and angry, while the other partner is experiencing very little stress and anger. Can faith in God have that kind of an effect on us? Clearly so, because in our example the difference is in the two partners’ belief systems, not in their physical capacity. From the wisdom literature we read, “As he thinks within himself, so he is” (Proverbs 23:7). How we behave flows from the reservoir of what we believe.

In short, how we react is as a result of how our minds are programmed, and the programming is as a result of what we believe; so we have to examine our belief for it our belief that sets the course of how our minds will interpret the circumstances that we face and thus determining the reaction we will have.

Your belief system cannot be that you are alone on this earth, that you are a failure, that nobody loves you, that you have to everything by yourself, that nobody understands you because it is such beliefs that will lead you to anger.

Some of you may feel that you can’t control your anger and reactions, but let me tell you something you can. If you believe it, really believe it, you can overcome your anger. I know a particular quote that says:” If you believe you can, you are right and if you believe you can’t, you are also right”

Take the belief that we find in Philippians 4:13: “I Can Do All Things through Christ Who Strengthens Me”.

Can you see that; the bible tells you and I, that we can do all things, not some things but all things through the strength of Jesus.

Here are a few questions one can ask themselves that may indicate the presence of anger; please let us examine ourselves because anger affects not only us but everyone and everything around us.

  1. Do you feel sometimes like hitting someone for one reason or the other?
  2. Do you feel an urge to retaliate when someone has insulted you or harmed you?
  3. Do you hate a person who has dealt with you unfairly? Or stolen from you?
  4. At night while lying in bed, do you think about people who have angered you? Who have hurt you? Could be a co-worker, a supervisor, husband/wife, parent or sibling; could be anyone.
  5. Do you willfully ignore a person? By pretending to be busy, or that you didn’t see them?
  6. Do you hung up a phone in the middle of a conversation?
  7. Do you ever walk out of a meeting or leave the house in protest?
  8. Do you interrupt others in the middle of a sentence? Either to justify yourself or to make a point?
  9. Do you sometimes feel like shouting at someone? You may not even know the person or that person may not have done you any harm.
  10. Do others frequently upset you?
  11. When you drive or travel, do you find yourself yelling at other people on the road?
  12. Do you throw things or kick things when you are angry? Your computer, phone, or any other thing in your path?
  13. Are calm in public but ‘different’ at home?
  14. Do you have good relationship with yourself, God and your neighbor?
  15. When things don’t go according to your expectations, or you face a difficult situation or you receive bad news, how do you respond? Do you react or act?

 

Words of Encouragement: Is it truly possible to be free from controlling anger? The answer to that question is a resounding “Yes!” Will it be a painless process? Probably not. Is it worth it? Absolutely, though you are going to have to come to that conclusion yourself.

Will you join me in this prayer?

Dear heavenly Father, You are a holy God, and You call me to be holy, set apart for Your use. Like You, I have the capacity for anger. But unlike You, I also have the capacity for using that anger wrongly. You have called me to freedom, but have told me not to use my freedom as an opportunity for the flesh. Rather I am to serve others in love. Please open my eyes to understand the source of my anger and the bitterness of my soul. Free me from my past, that it may no longer have any hold over me. Fill me with your Holy Spirit, that I may live a righteous life of patience, gentleness, and self-control. I thank You that You are indeed gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in loving-kindness and truth. In the name of the gentle and humble Jesus I pray, amen.

Thank you,

The Best Is Always Yet To Come

#7 Problem Solving: Einstein Formula

” We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

_Albert Einstein


Reading this, I’m thinking: no wonder the guy was a genius! I mean if we all thought like this when faced with a problem, I’m sure a lot would be different. But its unfortunate that it’s not always like that; a person would lie and get in trouble instead of coming clean and tell the truth, they’d still add more lies and thus getting into more trouble than before. I think the reason i suck at math is because I have failed to do just that, change my thinking with every problem encountered. And this applies everywhere not just in maths.

We can’t keep doing the same thing and expect a different outcome, its just not possible. So whenever you encounter a difficult situation, take a step back to see how and why it came about because only that will help you to make the right decision. 

Check out this one too also from Albert Einstein: ” It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” I’d say that happened to him because he always searched for new ways, change his thinking and such, as he tried that, he’d have a eureka moment, discoveries, that’s why we’re still talking about him even today.

So, Let’s change our thinking, discover new better  ways to handle daily issues and who know maybe it is that that will taken one at the center of the world. 

If we translate it in today’s language, I  believe it would be:” Think outside the box.”

What’s ur take on this?

Much Blessings!!



#6 Something We Can All Learn From

” Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself.”

_Groucho Marx


Well, there you have it. Ever since I was young, I have heard times and times again that experience is the best teacher but it just never convinced me. I believe that Experience is a teacher alright just not the best.

Looking at quote, I fell like shouting:” YESS” but I’m refraining myself!!😁 nevertheless, Groucho Marx hit the bull’s eye; we can’t go through life expecting to learn from our own experiences only. We gotta also read, listen to other people’s stories, watch and observe and learn from all that. Learning is a continuous process and it’s not done only through books but also from our entourage. I myself I am an observer, many a times I’ve been accused of staring too much or being shy whereas really all I’m doing is observing people, listening, paying attention to every detail, it’s just like a puzzle to me. But maybe that’s just my weirdness!!😅😅

I don’t know about you but for myself, i have avoided some very serious troubles by learning from others therefore I’m encouraging you to try this new way of learning, you won’t regret it. Also gotta keep in mind that no man’s an island.

If you’re faced with a problem, remember you’re not the first one to face it so before making a decision try to see and research how those that faced it overcame it or if they failed, why and how they failed.

What do you think about that quote? Agree or disagree? Feel free to comment your thoughts.


Much blessings!!

Next on Quote Dictionary: ” Problem Solving: Einsten’s Formula”


#5 Don’t Focus Only On Your Rearview Mirror

Never be a prisoner of your past, it was just a lesson not a life sentence.”

_Unknown


I don’t know who wrote this one but when I saw it, it spoke to me. It’s true that one’s past has a huge influence on the present and one may say that it shapes the person you later become; but let it not be a prison. Let us not hold on to the past hurts and tragedies. It’s true it was painful, dark and traumatising but we gotta look beyond that, see it as a life lesson and move forward to the future we desire not the one we fear.

Whatever’s happened to you, don’t let it hold you down, use it as a catapult to move forward. Don’t sit in the driving seat of your life and drive looking in the rearview mirror. I have had many times in my life when I thought that it was the end, that nothing good was ever going to happen; sometimes we find ourselves in that place between a rock and a hard place and you begin to think: “this is it, this is the end” isn’t it? Here’s the good news:
“No matter the length of the night, the morning will come and the sun will rise again.”

Looking at the past as a lesson not a life sentence is how you turn your scars into stars.



Thank you!! 

How does that quote strike you!? Please do share your opinion by commenting.

Much Blessings!!

Next on Quote Dictionary: “Something We Can All Learn From”

#4 Express yourself: You Are Unique

To the heart in you, don’t be afraid to feel

To the sun in you, don’t be afraid to shine
To the ocean in you, don’t be afraid to rage

To the silence in you, don’t be afraid to break.



Najwa Zebian


This speaks volume!! I can’t even begin to wrap my head around it.

What I see is: every person on earth is unique and particular. There are no photocopies, every person is original in his/her own way. No matter your position  and circumstances in life, you still have something to give. There’s someone out there who is in need of what you have, what you know, what you can do. 

So don’t be afraid to express yourself, let your heart feel, let your sun shine, let your ocean rage, break the silence!! Why?
Because there is no one and there’ll never anyone quite like you.


Feel free to express yourself by dropping one or two comments!! 

#3 Words Vs Actions

Children have never been good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”


James Baldwin


This right there, talks of real education. Being part of big family i have come to realise that my siblings aren’t really good at listening at all. For instance, I could tell my brother a thousand time to eat and he wouldn’t listen but when he sees me eating, he’d be like: ” hey make me something too”. But just not to blow my own trumpet even if it’s mine and i ought to be the one to blow it , I also behaved the same when I was his age.😅😅

This goes to show that when it comes to education, it is important to lead by example. Even research shows people remember most what they see than what they hear.

It’s actually true, there’s a another quote that says: “Action speak louder than voice.”  

 So, you got siblings, children, students, cousins, nieces, nephews, talk with your voice and your actions!!

What’re your thoughts on this?  

You’ll find me in the comment section!!

#2 This Is How You Know


You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”

Bob Hope


When I read this quote, the first thing that came to mind was: “voila!!” Second was: Can this even happen!?

Then I remembered my upcoming grandpa birthday, he will be reaching 100 years of age. Amazing right!? 

So, in his case, I believe that the candles will definitely be more expensive than the cake!!😂😂😂

How abouy you!? Whats ur take on this? Ur welcome to share by commenting!!

I dedicate this quote to all the elders and grandparents in the world!! Long life and Peace from God!!