Funny Questions & Answers #2

What sort of dog would a vampire own?

  • A bloodhound

What do you call a teacher with earphones in?

  • Anything you like- he can’t hear you

What do you call a fish that tunes piano?

  • A piano Tuna

What do you call a teacher who falls asleep in the class?

  • Nothing! You don’t want to wake him up!

What do you call a ghost’s horse?

  • A Nightmare

What does the invisible man call his parents?

  • Trans-parents

What do you call the Gotham city superheroes after they have been run over by a steam roller?

  • Flatman and Ribbon

What do you call the hairstyle you get from sticking your head in an oven?

  • A Micro-wave

What would you call a band that your father joined?

  • A Pop Group

What do you call cattle thieves who wear tissue paper trousers?

  • Rustlers

What’s the history teacher’s favorite fruit?

  • Dates

Did you hear about the teacher who had to wear sunglasses in the classroom?

  • He had extremely bright pupils

What’s the best way to tell your maths teacher that you’ve forgotten to do your homework again?

  • From a great distance

What gets wetter as you get drier?

  • Bath towels

Why do swimming tutors like elephants?

  • Because they never forget their trunks

Why is the sky so high?

  • So birds don’t bump their heads

What lies at the bottom of the sea and shivers?

  • A nervous wreck

Why do bees hum?

  • Because they have forgotten the words

How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge?

  • They leave footprints in the butter

What is yellow and very dangerous?

  • A laser powered banana

What does it mean if you find a set of horse shoes?

  • A horse is walking around in his socks

What is vampire’s favorite animal?

  • The giraffe- it has such a long neck !

What is the most valuable fish?

  • The goldfish !

What has one horn and gives fresh milk every day?

  • A milk lorry

What should you take if a monster invites you for dinner?

  • Someone who can’t run as fast as you !

Why do people employ skeletons?

  • Because they work their fingers to the bone !

Why are ghosts so bad at telling lies?

  • Because you can always see through them

Why did farmer send his cows to the gym twice a week?

  • He wanted low fat milk !

What do you do if a vampire bites your bottom?

  • I don’t know, but I wouldn’t recommend turning the other cheek !







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